Insights are Cheap but This is Priceless
By Darla LeDoux, Founder of Sourced™ and Author of the books Shift The Field and Retreat and Grow Rich
“So often we stay in this churn of insights because it’s fun. It’s exciting. But a lot of coaches aren’t firmly holding this container for their client to go face the thing that pops up and integrate that change into their life. We love the bright, shiny object. Or your clients might love the bright, shiny object of getting insights because it feels fun, and like they’re changing and growing. But if they look at their business results or their relationship results or their parenting results or their career results, they’re not actually moving. They’re in the same place, which can actually feel worse.”
Hi, this is Darla, and welcome to today’s video. And I want to let you in on a phrase that I am just loving so much right now, and I’ve even considered trademarking it. I have it on my website, and I originally used this phrase in a conversation with a friend, and when I said it, I went, “That’s so true. That’s so true.” And I believe it so passionately, I need to share it with you, and that is: Ah-has are cheap, integration is priceless, or another way to say it, insights are cheap, integration is priceless.
So I want you to think about this, do you have clients who are getting a lot of ah-has and maybe they’re even sharing with you? They’re cheering. They’re like, “Oh my God, I just got another aha.” You taught something and they went, “Oh,” or “I got an insight about why I’m doing this or why this happened.” Right? And that’s great. I’m not saying that is bad. That’s good. It can be helpful. But it also, it can be really, really easy to get an insight.
So if we think about just the idea of weight loss, if someone wants to lose weight, they probably have a hundred insights about their own relationship to their weight, right? If they didn’t, they’re probably not really interested in losing weight, right? They’ve been thinking about it. They’ve been maybe reading about it, learning different diets, trying different things, asking themselves, “Why is this happening?” Right? And so whatever area we can get insights in something, but that doesn’t mean it changes our life.
I remember when I was in my first marriage, and things weren’t great. There were a lot of issues, and I could figure them out. It was like, “Oh, I see why this is happening. I see that this was, he was this way and then that, and now this, and oh.” And I could really get very insightful about it, but none of that changed a damn thing, right? So if your clients are getting a lot of insights, but they’re not actually getting different results, I want you to just take a moment and breathe that in.
What would it be if I cared less about the insights and more about the results?
And getting an insight needs to be translated into integration in order to get a specific result. And I would even say, getting a truth, shifting your energy, right? Getting like, “Whoa, it’s totally possible to be a different energy about this.” Even that falls flat if we don’t actually go integrate that into our life.
So as an example, if I start to realize I’ve been heavy and negative about something, right? And I go through the process of understanding why, I get the insight, I get the truth, and I create a whole new possibility of being joyful, right? Or playful and playful feels so alive for me, and I’m so excited to be playful. But then I go back into my life and immediately the circumstance is going to show up that feels very serious and heavy, right, immediately. How I navigate that is everything to whether that transformation gets integrated, right, and is actually a lasting transformation.
So often we stay in this churn of insights because it’s fun. It’s exciting. “Oh my gosh, I see this. I did that.” Right? But a lot of coaches aren’t firmly holding this container for their client to go face the thing that pops up, right? And to really integrate that change into their life. We love the bright, shiny object, right?
Or your clients might love the bright, shiny object of, “Let me get another ah-ha and another ah-ha and another ah-ha.” And that feels fun and it feels like, “I’m changing, I’m growing.” But if they look at their business results or their relationship results or their parenting results or their career results, they’re not actually moving, they just know more and they’re in the same place, right, which can actually feel worse.
So what does this mean for you?
There is a process, a system, a structure for transformation, and I teach it in my new book. And I’m going to tell you how you can get a copy, but the third stage of that structure is what I call integration. And this is all about, we’re not going back and reinventing the wheel, we’re not coming up with a new ah-ha, but we’re actually saying, “Well, this is the energy. This is the idea. This is the way of being that we want to integrate.” And your job as the leader, as the coach, as the holder of the container, is to help your client actually integrate that one thing.
And as they do that, they will have ripple effects in all areas of their lives.
And they may have more insights as they do that, right?
But don’t skip that integration, have a whole program or an offer that’s all about the integration, right. You might have one program that helps them see the ah-ha, that helps them get the transformation, that initial energy shift, but then have a whole program that’s just about integrating that into their life. And if you do that, you’re operating in alignment with how transformation works. And it’s amazing. Don’t skip that. And if you don’t like doing that part, find a partner that does, right. Refer them to us because we freaking love it.
Okay, so I told you, I would tell you about my book. It’s called Shift the Field, and it is all about how transformation works consistently, predictably, and reliably and how, when you embrace the structure, you can free yourself to show up in your magic. It is going to be available coming soon. If you click the link in the comments or the show notes, you can get on a waitlist to be notified the moment it’s released.
We are really going for number one bestseller on day one, and I would love for you to be there, to purchase and to write a review. I’m giving away all kinds of gifts that first week that this book goes up for sale. So put your name and email in, and we will let you know, and I’ll see you in the next video.
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