Time Stand Still Moments
By Darla LeDoux, Founder of Sourced™ and Author of the books Shift The Field and Retreat and Grow Rich
Have you ever had one of those moments when time stood still? I have had plenty of these moments. You can remember with crystal clarity everything that’s happening around you. You can remember what you were wearing, what the other person was wearing. The entirety of the moment is frozen in your mind. Time stood still, and you knew in that moment, something was available, something was happening, but you only knew, in retrospect, the importance of that moment.
I had one of those moments. I was on my first date with my future wife/now ex-wife, and we were having this conversation. I had just come out. I had been living as a straight person for 39 years of my life, and it was suggested to me that I kind of had the energy of someone who was gay and didn’t know it. At that point, I decided to give myself that experience to find out if that was true. I discovered that it felt very true for me in my body.
Time stood still, and you knew in that moment, something was available, something was happening, but you only knew, in retrospect, the importance of that moment.
So here I am out on a date with a woman. I found myself sharing a bit of how I was newly out. And this person says to me, “I’m going to put you in a bubble and protect you from all those mean lesbians.” It was one of those moments, and I knew enough to know it was important.
Since I was newly “out,” I had no idea what she was talking about or who the mean lesbians were, or why I would need to be protected. The general idea was that I was fresh meat in the community. Therefore, it would be very scary, and I needed protection. Now, in this time, time stands still.
In that standstill moment, there were two parts of me communicating with me simultaneously. There was the part of me that said, ‘Well, that’s crazy. That’s weird. That’s not healthy. You don’t put people in bubbles. That’s not something you do. I’m not for that.” My friend calls them yellow flags, and this is a yellow flag. I don’t want to be in a bubble.
Another part of me said, ‘Yes, please put me in a bubble because I am freaking terrified. I don’t know how to be a lesbian. I’m afraid of mean lesbians. What does this even mean? Put me in a bubble and protect me, please?”
It was one of those moments, and I knew enough to know it was important.
These two parts of me are communicating at the same time. In retrospect, the more direct path to my truth would have been to say, “I’m not interested in being in a bubble. Let me go find out what’s happening out here.”
Yet, where I was in my own consciousness, my development, my self-confidence, and my personal alignment was not that. I had a choice. Where I was at the time was actually more aligned with being put in the bubble.
And that was the choice I made energetically. My mind didn’t say put me in a bubble. I didn’t act like I was in a bubble. Still, energetically, I agreed to this energetic connection to this sense of being protected by this other person.
In retrospect, the more direct path to my truth would have been to say, “I’m not interested in being in a bubble. Let me go find out what’s happening out here.”
This is something you can do without having to leave a relationship. If you made an agreement with a partner, or made an agreement with a client, to show up in a certain way, you can renegotiate that agreement. Maybe you agreed to be codependent with them and help them with everything and do all the extra work, and now you don’t want to anymore.
However, the other person has to also want to renegotiate that agreement. The other person has to be willing to also transform.
Let’s go back to the standstill moment. At this moment, I have the higher consciousness choice and the lower consciousness choice. One of those choices is Sourced, and one of those choices is Default, perhaps?
The choice, “I don’t need to be in a bubble,” is probably more Sourced, and “Please protect me,” is more Default. If I need protection this means somehow the world isn’t safe, or I’m not safe. That’s more default energy, and not needing a bubble would be more Sourced energy.
The question is, is one good or bad, right or wrong?
We could debate that. I could make an argument that my choice to go in the bubble was actually Sourced because where I was in that moment, I wasn’t yet prepared for no bubble. How do I know? I know because I chose the bubble.
Had I been prepared to have no bubble, that’s what I would have chosen. So clearly, my soul needed the bubble.
The lessons of this lower consciousness path create the contrast to help me see what it looks like to be on this higher consciousness path.
I could make an argument that my choice to go in the bubble was actually Sourced because where I was in that moment, I wasn’t yet prepared for no bubble. How do I know? I know because I chose the bubble.
Isn’t this interesting?
There is no wrong answer. Whatever I choose, I am still me at a soul level, who is here to express who I am at a soul level, and no one can take that away from me.
I have a friend who always says, “What’s yours is destined to be yours, so you can’t mess it up!” That’s basically what I’m saying here.
I want you to look at two things.
The Time Stands Still Moment
Be aware of the different options available to you. This Sourced message is coming through and it is a pivot point.
This is a moment, this is a choice, that’s going to set something in motion for you. You are making a choice: this way or that way.
When you notice these moments, believe yourself! If, in that moment, that you agree to an energy pattern that may not serve you, you can always go back and clean it up.
When you step into the world, especially the world we’re in right now, we are here to usher in a new vibration. That new vibration has to be you in alignment with your soul, with who you are, and who you came here to be.
I remembered that moment throughout the history of my relationship. I did attempt to go back and clean it up to broach that conversation and say, ‘Hey, I don’t want to be in a bubble. Let’s talk about this.” However my partner didn’t really want to resolve that. I would assert that she preferred the feeling of importance, or finding her value, in that idea of protecting me. I wasn’t able to shift the field (energy) in that agreement with her, so to step out of that energy required that we part ways.
That was the path I was on and where I was at the time I made that agreement. I was newly out and afraid of my own sexuality, or I probably would have come out many years earlier.
So I wanted to step into that bubble at some level. There were various times where I wondered what would have happened had I gone another way. However, I am so grateful for all of the learning, integration, and who I’ve become by going the way I did. It has helped me to embrace who I am.
I am so grateful for all of the learning, integration, and who I’ve become by going the way I did. It has helped me to embrace who I am.
While it may seem like I am now going backward, and I have grappled with this by the way, because I am now out of that relationship – I really didn’t. Everything I learned is now integrated, and I am in a place where I will be able to choose something different this time.
So how is this relating to you? What’s true for you regarding these time stands still moments? What energetic agreements have you made in your relationships? Or your career choices? Or in your business niche choices?
Maybe you went one way before, and now kind of feel like going another because you are at a different consciousness. And that is perfect. You are right on time.
We’d love to hear how this may be true for you!
If you’re feeling drawn to do this level of work, I invite you to join us at Shift the Field Live this February. We will be transforming the energy that gets in the way of you owning and honoring who you are in the world.
You can register now and hold your place for February, and we are going deep. We will teach you how this work will help you market, sell and deliver deep transformation and expand your magic in the world.
Maybe you went one way before, and now kind of feel like going another because you are at a different consciousness. that is perfect. You are right on time.
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