When to Hold Back Your Energy (even when you are a healer)
creating opportunities to get in the vibration you desire to be in the world

When to Pull Back Your Energy (even when you are a healer)
By Darla LeDoux, Founder of Sourced and Author of the books Shift The Field and Retreat and Grow Rich

 

June 14, 2022

As a transformational leader, I like to focus on the energy field and how to shift it to get completely different results in our lives. I wrote a book, Shift the Field, all about this! Today, I want discuss when to pull your energy back.  

 

Most of you are very impactful energetically in your life and tend to be givers. So when you show up in a relationship, your energy (whether it be expansive, compassionate, vibrational etc.) is a gift.

 

Now consider that there are people in your life that will receive your gift but do not appreciate, acknowledge, or reciprocate that gift. I am not saying that giving and receiving have to be 1-1, but there must be a healthy energy flow between people. 

Empaths are givers of energy. They show up on the scene, and people feel better. They ask questions that open something up for people, and they cause a new awareness to come into the space. 

 

What if you are in a relationship with someone who is not healthy and will not take all you give and build with it but instead will take it and just take it. These people will destroy and crush it. Please be aware of what we give in relationships like that. 

 

What do you do when you notice this happening?

 

First of all, you may not notice it happening because giving is such a big part of your being-ness that you can’t imagine being any other way.

consider that there are people in your life that will receive your gift but do not appreciate, acknowledge, or reciprocate the gift of your energy.

I share a helpful exercise using a T Chart over on my YouTube Channel.

    • On the top, write giving/receiving.
    • Down the left side, write down the names of the top five relationships or people you spend the most time with in terms of the giving and receiving of energy. 
    • Go through each name and evaluate how much you give energetically (space, validation, listening) and how much the other person gives for you to receive. Are they balanced? Or not really?

After you complete the exercise, did you notice that there are some relationships that you are giving energetically, and you’re not sure if you are receiving?

If so, consider pulling back energetically and see what happens. Don’t employ your magic quite so much and take note of what unfolds.

 

One of two things will happen. Either you will create enough space for the other person to reciprocate the giving, or you will realize that the space is there, while the other person is fueled by your energy but doesn’t intend to give back. 

 

If it is the latter, that person or those people may be depleting your life force without you even knowing it because you are so used to giving. Since you are such a giving life force, you feel everyone around you and are needed. It sometimes can feel terrific, but it is not good for you in reality. 

Go through each name and evaluate how much you give energetically (space, validation, listening) and how much the other person gives for you to receive. Are they balanced? Or not really?

We all deserve to be here and take up as much space as we want, but we believe that we must be giving to be valuable, so when we strive for value just for existing and begin to pull back our energy, it can be scary. 

 

    • How do we decide when to pull back energetically?
    • What do we notice when we become aware?
    • Can we sit with the results we uncover? 

When these deep-seated patterns show themselves when we have been trying to earn our keep in an unhealthy and depleting way, it can be scary to pull the energy back and create space for the other person to bring something to the table energetically. Will they do it? Or will they abandon me?

 

If that sounds true to you, get some support! 

When these deep-seated patterns show themselves when we have been trying to earn our keep in an unhealthy and depleting way, it can be scary to pull the energy back and create space for the other person to bring something to the table energetically.

There are several ways Sourced can support you through this. 

 

Your Sourced Expression – a six-month container of 1-1 coaching that will support you in navigating through this, getting energetically clean, and setting healthy boundaries with your clients and team. 

 

Certified Sourced Leaders – trained transformation coaches who have honed their skills through Source to hold space for you as you navigate and experience the reclaiming of your energy field by choice and through discernment rather than a habit or a matter of course. 

 

Doing this work matters. Knowing how to stay energetically clean and aligned is the most important thing you can do as a transformational leader. 

Doing this work matters. Knowing how to stay energetically clean and aligned is the most important thing you can do as a transformational leader. 

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