The Old Tired Path: Too Much versus Not Enough

The Old Tired Path: Too Much versus Not Enough

Apr 24, 2022 | Featured, Limited Training Series, Shift the Field TV, The Old Tired Path Series

The Old Tired Path Series: Too Much versus Not Enough
By Darla LeDoux, Founder of Sourced™ and Author of the books Shift The Field and Retreat and Grow Rich

 

Today we address the topic that I know will feel familiar to so many. It is such a common default energy pattern to feel inside that you are too much, or that you are not enough. I want to suggest that if you immediately identify with one side or the other of this equation, you actually are holding both equally.

 

People tend to have an automatic “preference,” so to speak, for one or the other.

 

“I’m too much” people are often aware that they took up a lot of space naturally, or brought forward ideas or emotions with an intensity that their family of origin could not hold. They are constantly on alert so they can hold a percentage of this back so as not to offend or hurt anybody.

 

“I’m not enough” people are consistently on alert for any perceived failure to be. They may overproduce, have perfectionist tendencies, and live with a generalized feeling of anxiety that does not make sense given their high performance. They may have never actually gotten feedback that they were not enough, however, perhaps a circumstance out of their control made them believe this. Like a parent leaving, for example.

The Old Tired Path (OTP) is an energy pattern based on something we learned in the past and is a filter by which we view the world.

The Old Tired Path (OTP) is an energy pattern based on something we learned in the past and is a filter by which we view the world. Your Old Tired Path might be getting in the way of your business growth, connection and intimacy in life, level of joy, expansion potential, etc.

 

Perhaps when you were young you were loud and expressive. You may have been told that you are “too much” and encouraged to tone it down. You may even have been shushed. So you hid. You held back, suppressed it, did not tell your truth. You thought it but did not say it. Eventually, you became “not enough” because you held your true self back.

 

Or maybe when you were young, you tended to be a wallflower. People may have said, “speak up” and make them see you. So you tended to insert yourself to prove yourself and ended up getting shushed and feeling embarrassed.

 

These seemingly polar opposites exist on the same energetic plane and you spend your life viewing and assessing yourself and others through this lens of too much versus not enough.

 

What is the impact of this filter on your life and business? Join me to learn how to step off into whole new energy with endless possibilities.

On the Old Tired Path, there is always a judgment.

The Old Tired Path: Powerless versus Powerful

The Old Tired Path: Powerless versus Powerful

Apr 16, 2022 | Featured, Limited Training Series, Shift the Field TV, The Old Tired Path Series

The Old Tired Path Series: Powerless versus Powerful
By Darla LeDoux, Founder of Sourced™ and Author of the books Shift The Field and Retreat and Grow Rich

 

Welcome back to the Old Tired Path Series! The Old Tired Path is an energy pattern that is so familiar that it is a part of how we live and breathe. As we grow and expand our businesses, we will be confronted with some limitations that our Old Tired Path will bring us. 

 

We have the choice to transform our energy patterns and step off that path at any time. If you want to learn more about the Old Tired Path, watch the first video in this series or read the first blog in this series that goes into this concept in more detail. 

 

We have crowdsourced the most common Old Tired Paths from our client base to break down for everyone. 

As we grow and expand our businesses, we will be confronted with some limitations that our Old Tired Path will bring us. 

Powerless versus Powerful

 

There were several versions of similar energy, so I would like to include them. 

 

Defer versus Controlling
Don’t Make a difference versus  Do Make a Difference

 

On the Old Tired Path, there is always a judgment. These get established when we are young, often before the age of seven, before we have a conscious mind, so we don’t even know we have an option to live any other way. We are constantly looking,  judging, and assessing ourselves. That becomes our filter for life. 

 

If we had an experience of powerlessness when we were young, we are constantly either trying to hide or trying to be in control. We don’t realize that we spend our lives on this path between the two whose outcomes are the same even though they seem opposites. 

 

If we feel powerless, we defer to others and don’t feel like we make a difference. We become passive and don’t try. We decide to wait and see. Will will avoid and hide. We feel embarrassed or ashamed. We look outside of ourselves to who is in charge and how they behave. We constantly analyze who is in power. We are always in a heightened awareness of everything happening around us and unable to rest. 

On the Old Tired Path, there is always a judgment.

On the opposite end of the Old Tired Path, we still judge ourselves. Am I in control and powerful? You do a lot. You have the attitude of “If it’s to be, it’s up to me!” You are taking charge and responsible. As a result, you are also looking outside of yourself. You are watchful of everything going on to see what I have to do here. After all, I have to make a difference because I am in charge.  

 

Some of the outcomes of being powerful are the same as being powerless. You cannot rest. You feel the need to be constantly aware and attentive. You feel embarrassed, ashamed, or guilty if anything goes wrong because it is your fault. 

 

Both ends of this spectrum can have us feeling the same way. Feeling powerless and feeling powerful end up bringing the same kind of vibe. Everything is coming through this filter of do I matter? Do I make a difference? Am I in charge, or am I a victim? Is life happening to me?

Some of the outcomes of being powerful are the same as being powerless.

We are so busy analyzing it that the outcome is the same. If you are resonating with this, please pause and do a bit of journaling and ask yourself, what is the impact of living on this Old Tired Path?

 

What impact does living with the constant filter of judgment – am I powerful or powerless –  have on my life? 

 

What if none of that mattered? If you could let go and step off this Old Tired Path into an entirely different realm where whether you were powerless or powerful didn’t matter, who would you get to be? What would that make available?

 

Love, nurturing, and experiencing are the words that come up for me. If I’m not measuring power, love seems like a beautiful measurement of life. How nurturing could I be of myself and others if power didn’t matter? How would I be able to experience this dance of life with others if I did not think of the concept of power?

 

If I could let go of power, I would be able to love, nurture and experience the world and life. How great would that be? What would be available if you stepped off this Old Tired Path?

If I’m not measuring power, love seems like a beautiful measurement of life.

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The Old Tired Path: Love versus Unloved

The Old Tired Path: Love versus Unloved

Apr 12, 2022 | Featured, Limited Training Series, Shift the Field TV, The Old Tired Path Series

The Old Tired Path Series: Loved versus Unloved
By Darla LeDoux, Founder of Sourced™ and Author of the books Shift The Field and Retreat and Grow Rich

 

Welcome back to my series on the Old Tired Path. If you are not sure what that is, I invite you to watch the first video of the Old Tired Path series on my YouTube channel. 

 

I have crowdsourced these common themes from my current clients. At Sourced, we work with transformational leaders (coaches, consultants, creators, and healers) committed to raising the consciousness on the planet and helping people shift their energy. One of the ways we do that as leaders are to be aware of the energy patterns we are bringing into the space.

 

The Old Tired path is an energy pattern based on something we learned in the past and is a filter by which we view the world. Today, we will explore the Old Tired Path of Loved vs. Unloved. 

The Old Tired path is an energy pattern based on something we learned in the past and is a filter by which we view the world.

Loved versus Unloved or
Accepted versus Rejected

 

What happens when you have a filter of loved or unloved? Let’s say you were the first child in your family; then your little brother came along. Suddenly, he was the favorite, and you felt unloved and rejected. You felt like whatever he had, you didn’t have, so you decided to figure out how to be loved. 

 

My parents divorced when I was young. It took me a long time to get to the place where I realized I had felt unloved and rejected when my dad would make plans with me, and often he would not show up. I would be sitting on the front steps waiting for him, but he wouldn’t show up, so I decided it must be something wrong with me, and that’s why he wouldn’t show up as opposed to assuming there was something wrong with him.

 

There are so many reasons a person might come up with this when in this situation. They decided they never want to experience the pain of being unloved and rejected again. So instead, they decide they will do whatever they can to be loved and accepted.  

 

What might this look like? What does someone who is trying to be loved and accepted do? How does that show up?

They decided they never want to experience the pain of being unloved and rejected again. So instead, they decide they will do whatever they can to be loved and accepted.  

These are some behaviors that might show up to get love:

 

  • They decide they are going to be who other people want. Or at least those they are seeking love and acceptance from. 
  • They will figure out what those people want from them and then deliver that. 
  • They will withhold their truth to avoid conflict. 
  • They will be overly friendly. 
  • They will buy the love through gift-giving. 

 

They will constantly be asking, do you love me now? Do you love me now? Based on the Old Tired Path, we exist between these two beliefs: do you love me? Do you not love me?

 

On this Old Tired Path, we constantly see everything in life through this filter of being loved or unloved. When we do that, the experience of who I have to be to get love and the outcome of being unloved and rejected have the same flavor even though they seem opposite of each other. 

 

When we are doing all the things to get love, we subconsciously think you don’t love me. The more we try to get love, the more we feel unloved. 

When we are doing all the things to get love, we subconsciously think you don’t love me. The more we try to get love, the more we feel unloved. 

When we are coming from a place of being or feeling unloved, some behaviors are the same as when we are trying to be loved. 

 

If someone feels unloved, they probably display the following behaviors: 

 

  • They withhold their love. 
  • They often think, “why should I bother to share who I am with you?” 
  • When they give from a place of being unloved, they are rarely received. 
  • You don’t give other people a chance to contribute or give to you. 

 

Our entire worldview is interpreted through this filter of being loved or unloved. It is the same energy. The outcomes of being loved and being unloved are the same. Please let me know if you are relating to this. 

 

It happens all the time and makes it hard for others to feel connected to you. 

The outcomes of being loved and being unloved are the same.

So what do you do?

 

First, get present to this energy pattern and its impact. How is this showing up in your life and your business? If this resonates with you, I encourage you to pause for a minute and journal about this. 

 

Suppose you are living in this energy pattern. Are you trying to get clients to love you, but you are secretly afraid they won’t? In that case, you may be overgiving, overdelivering, experiencing people leaving, and people may be unable to get results because they are unable to receive from your energy?

 

If the concept of love versus unloved did not exist, what would be available? Who would you get to be instead? If, no matter what, I could never be loved, what would that make available? Who would you be if you could step off the Old Tired Path?

 

For me, the word that pops to mind is vocal, what comes up for you as an energy or way of being when you step off this path?

 

Let me know in the comments down below! 

Sourced Magic Business is an eight-week group experience that helps you shift your energy field and helps you design a business that invites your clients to do the same.

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